Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
Randomize
