it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Randomize
