I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
