Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
