my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Randomize
