They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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