how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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