You work out of a Hotel?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize
