We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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