omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Farmville is her only friend.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
