The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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