I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
