Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize
