Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
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