his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Holy shit dude........stairs
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
