HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize