At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
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