How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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