drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
