I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
