Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
