you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
