i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
