I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
