im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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