I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Randomize
