And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Randomize
