You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
