Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize