I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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