Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
