What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
