God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
