Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
