he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
