Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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