Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
