Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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