mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
