I feel great
I just peed on a car
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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