what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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