I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
