If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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