Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
