Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
