i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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