There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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