just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
