We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Randomize
