'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
We need to rekindle our bromance
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I just want nice things and good sex
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
